Sunday, August 9, 2026

Ocean D&D: Session Documentary

I played a stomatopod in Spuk's OD&D (Ocean D&D) game, and had a great time. Here's a session report. Note that none of the "scientific facts" are guaranteed to be accurate - do your own research.

Also, you must read the report in the voice of David Attenborough.

“The reef is one of the most complex environments on Earth. Hundreds of species live side by side, and form intricate, symbiotic relationships.

“To see this interspecies cooperation in action, let us take a closer look at just five of the creatures inhabiting this reef.”



“Two hermit crabs, whom we’ll call Magnifico and Crabraham Lincoln.”


“Two axolotls, who will go by Mantle-of-Cloud and Amby.”


“And one stomatopod: Creel Crusher.”

“These five companions have left the reef, in search of food or anything else of interest to bring back home. As they explore the open seafloor, they do find something interesting. Perhaps too interesting.”


“It’s a giant triton snail, towering over the five smaller creatures. The hermit crabs greedily eye its huge shell, which would be a major home improvement for either one of them. But Creel Crusher cautions them that the snail would be an overwhelming opponent, even for the five of them together. The group decides to move aside and let the massive snail continue on its way.

“The bulbous eyes of a stomatopod can see millions of colors, and it is even believed that they can read the ‘aura’ of other creatures and assess their strength. A helpful ability when making the decision between fight and flight.

“Our five intrepid explorers continue into a kelp forest, still on the lookout for anything worth bringing back to the reef. It seems that Mantle-of-Cloud has found something. A rectangular box. Quite an unusual sight on the seafloor. But it is stuck in the ground. As the group attempts to unearth it, danger draws near.



“Dozens of sea nettle jellyfish. The faintest touch of their stinging tentacles is enough to incapacitate or even kill a small creature like an axolotl. If the group wants the mysterious box, it’s now or never. But Mantle-of-Cloud has a solution.

“This is one of the most remarkable spectacles of nature. The nanites inside the tail of the axolotl activate, and exert a magnetic force upon the stubborn box, pulling it out of the ground and onto Mantle-of-Cloud... where it dissolves?

“Indeed, the box was composed of more nanites, which are absorbed by the axolotl—doubtlessly granting them yet another mysterious power. With the treasure secured, Mantle-of-Cloud and their friends make a quick escape from the frightening jellyfish.

“Hiding in the kelp, the five creatures settle down to rest. But a few hours later, they are in for a rude awakening.”


“It seems our bold travellers have blundered into the territory of kelp crabs, which have now surrounded the five intruders, menacingly clicking their claws at them. But the hermit crabs, Magnifico and Crabraham Lincoln, click their claws back at them, and the situation calms down. It seems that a deal has been made.

“The five explorers join forces with the kelp crabs, journeying through the kelp forest until they reach their goal: a giant clam.”

“The flesh of this massive mollusc would make a delicious meal for the kelp crabs, if they could only get at it—preferably without becoming trapped inside its shell. Perhaps the reef creatures can help them out.

“The hermit crabs heave a rock up to the mouth of the clam, trying to jam it open. But the clam closes, expelling the rock. Now what?

“Mantle-of-Cloud digs at the spot where the clam is connected to the ground, exposing its fleshy foot. This, too, is a tempting meal. The kelp crabs swarm it, and start feasting... but the clam becomes unstable. It topples over, crushing half of the kelp crabs, as well as Crabraham Lincoln! The poor hermit crab has been ended by this ‘Clam Wilkes Booth’.”


“Just then, a new denizen of the reef arrives upon the scene. An octopod, whom we will call Octo-Potato.

“In its fall, the giant clam has opened back up again. Now’s the chance. The surviving kelp crabs rush in, tearing away at the soft insides of the clam. Creel Crusher and Octo-Potato has spotted something else within the clam. Together, they manage to extract it: a huge pearl. Now, sea creatures obviously have no concept of wealth or monetary value... but everyone likes a pearl.

“The kelp crabs have finished off the giant clam, and feast on its flesh—as well as the flesh of their fallen comrades. There is little sentimentality under the sea. The reef denizens also enjoy a hearty meal. Octo-Potato devours the crushed Crabraham Lincoln. To octopods, crabs are a particular delicacy. But the creatures of the reef don’t just eat. They also take with them as much food as they can carry, in their shells, paws, mandibles, and tentacles. The pearl is brought along too, of course, as the five travellers head for home.”


“They run into some crown-of-thorns starfish on the way, but give the spiky creatures a wide berth.

 “Finally the group returns to the reef, where the collected food is shared with the other inhabitants.”

“It is a moment of triumph not just for the five explorers, but for the reef as a whole.

“After resting up, our five heroes are still restless. They set out on another expedition, this time onto the open sand plains on the other side of the reef. But they don’t get far before they run into danger once more.”


“A pair of cuttlefish, hungry for crab. As they approach, their bodies turn sharp white. A hypnotizing color, which transfixes Creel Crusher and Amby. Those who retain their senses must escape quickly—and take their friends along. Magnifico grabs onto Creel Crusher and drags them away. Meanwhile, Octo-Potato sprays ink to confuse the cuttlefish, while holding onto Amby and Mantle-like-Clouds with their tentacles. Mantle-of-Clouds activates their nanites once more, but now for a different effect. The axolotl expels a jet of water that propels them at high speed, along with Octo-Potato and Amby.

“The cuttlefish give chase, and before long, they catch up to the group. But now the reef dwellers have come back to their senses, and they stand and fight. Creel Crusher squares up to a cuttlefish—and strikes.

“There is a flash of light. The cuttlefish is knocked out cold in an instant.

“A stomatopod’s punch accelerates at a rate similar to that of a pistol shot, and can strike with a force of 1,500 newtons. A direct hit can incapacitate a creature many times the stomatopod’s size, as this cuttlefish just discovered.

“Meanwhile the other cuttlefish is set upon by Magnifico and Octo-Potato. The octopod wields sharp clam shells into the fight, and together, the two of them makes short work of the cuttlefish.

“An octopod’s capacity for using tools is a clear sign of their high intelligence. Who knows what else these creatures may be capable of?

“With the cuttlefish defeated, the group drags them back to the reef for all to feast upon. Certainly all five explorers have learnt from their experiences, and Creel Crusher’s fighting skills seem to have reached a new level.”

"The old moray eel that dwells on the outskirts of the reef seems to have noticed the group's success. Perhaps it will take interest in their further activities..."